I listened to a sermon online this morning from my church back home, it was about relational entanglement for the Glory of God. It was so good. Something that stuck out was how God asks us to enter peoples lives for His glory. Zechariah 7:9 "This is what the LORD Almighty says: 'Administer true justice; show mercy and compassion to one another..." Dan specifically said when we have roommates, they are just not just people with a roof over our heads, they are relationships that God wants us to become entangled in for His glory. At first I struggled to find my place living among three other women, after living on my own for 3 years. It drives me crazy because my sin becomes even more evident when living in such close community with others. As I write this the suns starts to try and peak it way out! YEAH! Recently though, God has started to change my heart about living with so many other women, to a thankful heart. I am so thankful to live with others who are going through the same transition. As hard as it is, and as frustrating as it can be to see my own sin, it has been so good. It's messy entanglement that God uses for His glory!
On a similar note, God used the time over Thanksgiving to really reset a heart of rest in my life. I came down with a cold right before the break, and so I have spent much of the past 2 weeks seeking out extra rest. Wow! It's amazing what rest can do! I had been going and going since I set foot here in Hungary, (besides a few somewhat restful weekends). God has really been opening my eyes more to the needs of my students. He has been showing me how I can be impatient and not merciful with my students at times. He is teaching me to step back and really pray for them. I find myself struggling with the balance of consistency and grace in discipline. Instead of getting frustrated stepping back and just sharing my disappointment. As I reflect this is how my faith wavers. It boggles my mind that God's love and steadfastness for me never changes.
There are certain thing in my life going on that I want to completely avoid, I would rather just not deal with. Knowing my own weaknesses. In a way I am holding a closed fist! God is slowly working on me that I don't have to have to deal with it, or make the change in my life on my own. All He wants me to do is open my hand and daily lay it at His feet. I just have to keep Satan from getting a foothold, by taking my thoughts that lead to my plans captive, and lifting up my vulnerability to God! It has been soo good to teach my kids the truths of the bible, and I continually stress that we are not finished yet. That although we accept this perfect gift from God, and He takes our sin, that we are still sinful and that we just need to confess it to God. Such a basic truth, that is something that I learn over and over again. As the Lord breaks down my pride, and I learn to seek Him and really rest in Him.
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